Fear, anger and sadness: enemies or friends of the trader?
You may think of yourself as a rational being, but in fact everything you do in life is determined by your emotions. Emotions upset you, drive you psychologically, intimidate you, or inspire you. They motivate your decisions, drive you to action, or paralyze you in a state of anxiety, stress, and fear. They are also the basis of your best memories.
In this article we will look at Four basic principles for dealing with your emotions, as well as three strategies for dealing with the influx of intense feelings such as anxiety, anger, and sadness.
Emotions are volatile
You may feel anxious, feel angry the next second, and then be swept up in a wave of sadness that comes seemingly out of nowhere. Precisely because they can easily take you on a roller coaster ride, many people tend to be extremely wary of strong emotions and make every effort to avoid them whenever possible.
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You probably already have experience with so-called "negative" emotions, such as fear, anger, and sadness. You remember the consequences they have had because you could not deal with them in time. The imprints of psychological trauma resulting from such situations are stored deep in your subconscious, forcing you to be careful. Just remembering these emotions is enough to make you feel vulnerable.
You may have even tried to deal with emotional impulses by rationalizing them. You thought it was easier to focus on your thoughts rather than wallow in the terrible world of feelings. However, every mind has its limits. You may delude yourself into thinking you are more rational than you really are. You may think through alternatives or analyze your own thoughts, but your final "Yes" and "No" are based on what you "feel is right." Even if your focus is on thinking rather than feeling, in the end your decisions and actions are based on your inner feelings.
Precisely because emotions so strongly determine our decisions and actions, scare or inspire us, and communication with others without them is not possible at all, it is important to learn how to skillfully handle them.
4 principles of managing emotions
Let's look at four basic principles that will help us treat our emotions consciously, recognize and accept them. Continuous practice will help you develop your emotional intelligence, which is a necessary quality for mastering your emotions. In addition, it is the emotional rather than rational intelligence is for the trader the main thing in his work.
The only possible option is to let your emotions out.
Your first thought when experiencing a negative emotion, such as fear, anger, or sadness, may be to suppress it. Or to distract yourself from unpleasant feelings. Or even try to drive these feelings deep into your subconscious, where they will be stored, causing internal tension and depriving you of peace of mind and equilibrium. However, in the end, they will still come out, only it can happen at the most inopportune moment and with the most unpleasant consequences.
It is useful to know that repressed emotions are the basis for the formation of compulsive and harmful habits, as well as a source of psychological overload and problems in relationships.
Emotions arise as a response to what is going on in and around us, as well as with other people. And this information, in one way or another, will haunt us until we become aware of it and pay proper attention to it. Thus, We can consider the emotions that arise as useful signals. They bring us information about our lives, about what is happening to us. Principle number one is to stop ignoring and trying to suppress emotions, and instead pay attention to what they are trying to convey to us.
You can start learning this right now. Just pay attention to how you are feeling in the moment. Pay particular attention to any discomfort you are experiencing. It is these feelings that usually contain important clues about what you need to know and do in the here and now. This kind of awareness takes practice. But it is simply a skill you can learn. Remember, if you don't pay attention to what your emotions are trying to tell you, they will come back again and again.
Awareness of emotions changes the way you relate to them
Awareness is Attention to the present moment without evaluation or judgment. When strong feelings arise, instead of immediately trying to do something about them, try to hear and acknowledge them. This allows you to look at what is happening from a completely different angle, gaining a new experience. You become aware of your true feelings and learn to understand yourself. It's like you go to a new emotional level, learning to influence what's affecting you.
Awareness reduces the element of involvement by creating an internal mental distance between you and your emotions. It liberates you. You gain the freedom and understanding that feelings do not define "who you are. They are simply information about what is going on inside you, around you and with other people.
Emotions come and go
All feelings are transient. This is reassuring. What now seems like the end of the world and a total collapse, in six months will not seem so scary, and in a year will even make you smile at the memory.
It's perfectly normal to experience emotions, but you shouldn't dwell on them at all.
Accept them, understand the information they are trying to bring to us, and let them go. If you treat them as mailmen bringing information, you can learn to use them to your advantage, instead of wasting energy on pointless struggles.
Every emotion carries a message
After you've realized that you're experiencing certain emotions (sadness, anxiety, irritation, depression, etc.), try to realize what you mentally said to yourself the second before. What you were thinking about, or maybe you had a mental image in your head, a picture that you imagined. It might be a memory or an association. That's the message you need to decipher. It's a feeling that tells you how you feel about yourself, about what's going on, or about other people.
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Now, given the information you have received, think about what you can do or change? Just write down everything that comes to mind.
Because we are not usually taught to recognize the meaning encoded in emotions, we often miss, ignore, or avoid the messages they carry. Their purpose, however, is no different. As a result, instead of telling us what we need, our emotions try to "shout" to us. And the more deaf we are to their messages, the louder their cry gets. Eventually we begin to experience what usually bears such epithets as "destructive anger," "overwhelming sadness and longing," and "terrible anxiety. You then feel extreme anger, overwhelming sadness, or anxiety that is through the roof.
When the emotional upsurge reaches this level, it is no longer time for analysis and reflection. Even the famous practice of mindfulness can fail. So let's look at a few simple but effective actions for lowering the emotional temperature.
3 recommendations for reducing the intensity of emotions
Stop, close your eyes, and take several slow, deep, calm breaths.
Stop all activity, close your eyes, and concentrate on slow, deep, steady breathing through your nose. Closing your eyes promotes a natural relaxation of your body, which helps to release excessive tension, equalize blood pressure, and reduce the intensity of strong emotions.
2. Listen to your body
Pay attention to exactly where in your body the emotion is now. Try to understand and clearly define your feelings. This awareness of emotion through physical sensation helps you perceive it more objectively. You get an opportunity to create distance between emotions and physical sensations in your body, to sort of separate them.
3. Take the position of a bystander
Yes, I understand very well how difficult it is. But it will be much easier for you when you learn not just to react spontaneously to your emotions, but to listen to them, to analyze them, and to understand them. Treat them as a friend and ally who wants to tell you something of value.
Remember that mindfulness is an unevaluated perception of the present moment, according to the "here and now" principle. An ancient Eastern wisdom says, "the secret of calm is simple: wash the cup, think of the cup. Gradually you will learn to be in this state most of the time. And it is from a state of equilibrium that you ask your emotions questions as if they were a friend trying to give you valuable information, or you were a scientist seeking discovery.
Conclusion
By following these simple guidelines, you will be able to extinguish outbursts of emotion, and for you furious anger can turn into a calm "no." Longing and sadness will be transformed into sadness, and increased anxiety can turn into motivation for deliberate action.
After the heat of passion has subsided, it is easier to listen to yourself and your inner feelings. You can make a more rational decision, find a way out. After all If you take emotion out of the problem, you're just left with a situation.. The point is, instead of being afraid of fear, anger, and sadness, consider whether you can approach these feelings consciously, with curiosity and exploration. Turn your worst enemies into allies, and they can tell you where to go next.